Sunday, September 24, 2006

While Perusing the Internet for Halloween Costumes This Weekend....




I got squeezed through a vajajay last year and all I got was this dumb costume.










Just because it's on clearance, doesn't mean you should buy it, kay?










WTF? Someone found my Cabbage Patch Kid and dressed him up in an Elvis costume.











The "soldier bunting infant costume". Assault rifle sold separately.












I'm so getting you back for this by taking my friends for a joyride in your car when I turn 14.













That's it, someone call CPS.

52 Comments:

Anonymous sweatpantsmom said...

I'm speechless. Why anyone would want to dress their kid up as a whoopee cushion I'll never understand.

But the air freshener - now that's pure genius.

12:28 AM  
Blogger carrie said...

And I thought I'd seen it all . . .

I pray that my boys don't find that whoppee cushion costume.

Carrie

1:22 AM  
Anonymous wendy boucher said...

A whoopee cushion? Holy crap. Please tell me it's a joke.

6:10 AM  
Blogger metro mama said...

Terrible!

7:33 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Chicky said...

I am so going out to find a whoopie cushion costume for my kid. Darnit, I'll make one if I have to. No "trick or treat" for us. No ma'am. This year I'm going door to door with my kid in her costume and when someone opens the door I'll yell "Whoopee!"

7:35 AM  
Anonymous chelle said...

hehehe those are so cute!

7:54 AM  
Blogger Mary-LUE said...

Those are so funny! They have definitely, um, upped the quirky ante since my kids were babies.

8:14 AM  
Blogger Poppy Buxom said...

I'm keeping my kids away from the computer starting NOW. Lord knows I don't need to be asked to make/buy something like that!

8:22 AM  
Blogger Oh, The Joys said...

People will buy anything. I used to make handmade jewelry and sell it at art fairs. One day, just to check this theory, I wrapped a rock in copper wire with a few random and very ugly beads caught in said wire. I hung the whole mess on a leather strap, priced it and put it out.

It was the first thing to sell.

10:17 AM  
Blogger kim said...

Ohhh my goodness the things some people do their kids ....
That hotdog was pretty cute though lol
This comment posted by a mom who dressed her baby as a pumpkin :)
I couldnt help itttt ...his red hair just looked like the topper for his costume :)

10:29 AM  
Blogger Mommy off the Record said...

Nope, the whoopie cushion costume is not a joke. In fact, it comes in adult size too, just in case you and your infant want matching costumes. LOL

11:16 AM  
Blogger Mona said...

The whoopee cushion is sooo something my husband would buy, which is why I am restricting his internet access from here on out.

And no you didn't say vajajay!

11:31 AM  
Blogger Nikkie said...

Okay, that whoopie cushion costume is just freaking hysterical. Now that would be a black mail picture!

12:09 PM  
Blogger Mega Mom said...

So funny. I can't be the only one tempted by the whoopie cushion, can I?

12:22 PM  
Blogger Jill said...

My 4-year-old snuck up behind me as I was reading this and he thinks the Wonder Bread costume would be perfect for his baby sister. Now he wants to type.

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2:11 PM  
Blogger Mom101 said...

Hold me mommy, I'm scared.

2:50 PM  
Anonymous Much More Than A Mom said...

Hilarious! I saw those when I was looking for Rylan's costume too. Needless to say, I didn't buy one. I ended up finding him a cute one locally.

I have a friend with two wiener dogs who are dressing up in buns and their 6 month old son is going to be french fries!

3:08 PM  
Anonymous Mother said...

OMG. I'm not sure if it's funny or really scary.

The air freshener? Whoopppeee Cushion?

HAHAHAHAAHAHA

4:41 PM  
Blogger crazymumma said...

AAAWWWW, baby Elvis. What are You dressing up as? Yes, you!

5:10 PM  
Blogger Jaelithe said...

Well, at least I can say these baby costumes are MUCH better than the costumes I've seen advertised for girls aged 4-11 this year, which are basically 32 flavors of prostitute.

(Hey, I dressed my red-headed baby as a pumpkin once too, Kim. Red-headed babies just look so good in orange!)

5:20 PM  
Anonymous Nancy said...

Whoa. Some costume designer somewhere has waaay too much time on their hands!

5:31 PM  
Blogger Lawyer Mama said...

Baaaa haaa! I love the whoopie cushion! It's both incredibly tacky & hilarious in a junior high kind of way. I can't be the only one tempted here....

5:55 PM  
Blogger Jen said...

They are all hilarious....just too funny. Enjoyed the laugh.
Jen

6:13 PM  
Anonymous Momish said...

I've seen these and it's too funny. And, yet, people keep telling me I'm mean because I want to put my kid in a real halloween costume with scary stuff like dead rats and all. To me, a whoopee cushion is the scariest thing I've seen yet! Now, that's just mean!

6:46 PM  
Blogger Waya said...

Oh my goodness!! These kids will need therapy when they grow up.

6:52 PM  
Blogger beth said...

OMG! I was looking at that website just yesterday. I think my decision upon clicking away was that I'd give a go at making a costume. The thing I really will never understand is the whole baby fatigues thing.

7:21 PM  
Blogger Oblivious Maven said...

The comment on the air freshener was toooooo funny!!

7:44 PM  
Blogger Mommy off the Record said...

I hope I haven't offended anyone who had planned to dress their child as a whoopie cushion or an air freshener for Halloween. I mean, I totally get wanting to have a *unique* costume. I mean, we do kinda have enough witches and scarecrows so I guess a whoopie cushion is a nice way to break the monotony when you think about it. *snicker*

Crazymumma: I have yet to decide what I will be for Halloween, but I do have a post brewing on that very subject...

Jaelithe: I know what you mean about the tween costumes. Out of curiosity, I checked them out and found some of them to be fairly inappropriate. Big surprise.

9:45 PM  
Anonymous mamatulip said...

"Assault rifle sold separately."

*snort*

The air freshener is the best.

4:34 AM  
Blogger The Imperfect Parent said...

Thanks for the Monday morning giggle. I'm about as crafty as a Bears Linebacker, so I appreciate all of them.

5:23 AM  
Anonymous slackermommy said...

Mega Mom and Lawyer Mom- I'm also tempted to put my little bits in the whoopee cushion. I think it's hysterical. My kids are obsessed with whoopee cushions.

Mommy of the record- Not at all offended. With my first two babies I only put them in really cutesie costumes. But now after having four I think my sense of humor has gotten a little sick and twisted. Thanks for the laugh!

6:47 AM  
Anonymous wordgirl said...

Dressing your baby up like a whoopie cushion. It's just so wrong.

10:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

These are no worse than what I did to my son while I was 6 months pregnant with him. Every time I think of it, I'm ashamed, but still end up snorting laughter. At least the pictures look normal, though. You know this joke?

There was a little Indian (feathers, not dots) boy who asked his grandfather, "How do we get our names?" His grandfather replied, "Well, when your parents believed they have just conceived you, they note the first thing they see when they come out of their teepee, and that's what you're named after. Like Running Horse or Flying Bird. Why do you ask, Two Dogs F$#*ing?"

Yes. You can see where this is going, can't you? My husband was the Indian man; I was the Indian woman, and we put a name tag on my pregnant belly with Two Dogs F$#*ing. REAL classy, huh? We're horrible, awful people. SERIOUSLY. I can't believe I even consented to that. We made our unborn son the punchline to an incredibly off color joke. And we laughed about it.

Whoopie cushion? I'm thinking that's a step up.

Andrea (littlebalddoctors.wordpress.com) Blogger behaving badly again, though I did consider posting this anonymously because DAMN! I'm terrible.

11:19 AM  
Anonymous Jenny said...

I just snorted.

That my friend? Was awful...and hilarious.

12:24 PM  
Blogger Zephra said...

These are great!!! Almost as bad as pet costumes.

12:49 PM  
Blogger jen said...

that whoopie cushion ROCKS.

1:13 PM  
Blogger virtualsprite said...

Oh, but I do love the air freshener. My mom hung them all around the Ubergoober's diaper genie when he was a baby.

Tempting, very tempting.

1:19 PM  
Anonymous CrankMama said...

When I was young, we made our halloween costumes out of boxes and foil. Life was simpler then...

My kids go as whatever costumes are for sale at Costco.

2:29 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Those are SO FUNNY. I can't wait to tell my sis about this entry on your site!

3:35 PM  
Anonymous mothergoosemouse said...

I think I just figured out what Kyle and I will be for Halloween.

I'll be the hot dog, and he can be the whoopie cushion. Only thing better would be if I could dress up as a bunch of baby back ribs.

5:34 PM  
Blogger The Flip Flop Mamma! said...

I am SOOOO gonna make my baby the car-freshener this halloween!!! Too funny!!! Muwahahahahaha....

6:10 PM  
Blogger monica said...

Ok. Flip's lost it. I so find the green one the MOST disturbing and I have no idea why?

You rock. Love the laughs.

6:16 PM  
Blogger Dirty Birdie said...

Sweeeet, I want one. I thought dressing my dog up like a Milkbone was fun....

6:38 PM  
Blogger Lindsay said...

hahahahaaaaaa!

5:09 AM  
Blogger Queso said...

I love it. What does that say about me?

6:29 AM  
Anonymous Izzy said...

Am I nuts? Didn't I leave a comment to this post last night?

7:55 AM  
Blogger Red Rollerskate said...

I refuse to allow my baby - via his Halloween costume - to be a crawling advertisement, promote war, or condone fake fartey sounds! That's where I draw the line.

9:24 PM  
Blogger Mommy off the Record said...

Red Rollerskate: I couldn't have said it better myself! Especially that part about the fake farty sounds.

9:38 PM  
Blogger Pattie said...

Hahahahahahahaha......
OMG those are the BEST! Particularly the whoopie cushion! I feel bad for laughing but, damn, that was funny :)

3:55 PM  
Blogger something blue said...

I love Halloween! The night we are required to dress our children to look funny and take many pictures. Not to mention that babies can't eat candy but feel free to give us more treats because don't you think my little Wonderbread baby is adorable?

8:46 AM  
Blogger mad muthas said...

bloody hell - that's tantamount to child abuse. think of the photos you could produce during their teen years - the potential for blackmail! fortunately in the uk we're not quite that loopy yet ... but it's only a matter of time. actually, the great and good are trying to ban trick or treating, and particularly the wearing of masks for same, because the asbo-ed youth of britain consider it open season for assualt and battery. ahhh - makes yer proud to be british!

2:12 PM  
Blogger Jenn said...

Awww commmmmon!!! YOU PHOTOSHOPED THOSE!!!!

10:57 AM  

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