Post Party Vent-a-Thon
DEAR ABBY: Is it poor etiquette to RSVP to a birthday party and then not show up? What about RSVPing "yes" and then calling the night before to say you can't come? Cuz when I throw a party expecting 30 friends and family, I expect 30 friends and family to show up. Not 25, not 20. THIRTY. If I expected 20 to show up, I would not have purchased the extra sandwich wraps from Costco, nor would I have spent more for the large veggie dip platter.
And what's with all the lame excuses? Just listen to a few of the gems dished out to me by relatives:
Excuse: Oh poor me, I have the sniffles. I don't think I can make it.GAH! See what I'm dealing with Abby? It's so frustrating.
Retort: Dude, unless you have the f-ing flu, you better get your butt over to this party. Now.
Excuse: A parolee led police officers on a high speed chase that ended just a mile from your house. Now the main street that leads to your place is blocked off so...I don't think we're going to be able to come.
Retort: Whaaat?? Well, hey, this is city living. You better just park your vehicle and walk in. I don't care if it is 109 degrees.
Excuse: I had my DUI hearing yesterday and afterwards I got into a fight with mom and dad and now I don't want to come to the party because I can't stand to be around them one more second.
Retort: Get. Over. Here. And then hand me a dishtowl so I can hit you over the head with it.
Sincerely,
Miffed Mama
DEAR MIFFED MAMA:
These people sound like boobs. Are you sure you're blood related to them? I say you're better off without 'em anyway. The people who came are the people who count.
DEAR ABBY:
Thanks. I knew they were boobs, but it helped to hear YOU say that. Oh, and I must say that there is some good news. All of Little Guy's one-year-old buds showed up. I guess only mommies know how truly important the first birthday is.
Oh yeah, baby. I've been waiting ALL year for this.
posted by Cristina @12:09 AM
51 Comments:
Boobs for sure!! Oh I'd have been mad about that.
But oooooh not for long - look at that first birthday cake photo. The cutest!
Amen! First birthdays can not be skipped under any circumstance.
LOVE the picture.
I'm definately agree that they are boobs.It's so funny/gets you pissed off at the excuses they give you.
But the best point of this post is: WOOT! Little kid smooshing cake picture!
He's such a cute little guy. (end gushing here.)
Love the photo. Cake on the face first birthday photos are priceless.
That is a cute picture. First birthdays are a definate must see whether if you have to walk six miles barefoot in snow...lol.
I'm sure the little one had fun even if everyone wasn't able to make it.
People can suck, can't they? Even people you know. I'm sure you had just as nice a time without them. Happy b-day LG
Boobs, the lot!
Lamest excuse I've ever heard? My grandmother, who'd been offered a ride with my aunt, telling me she wasn't coming TO MY WEDDING because, "we're just getting old, I guess." She was in her mid 60s when I got married. (My husband's grandmother, who is in her 80s, just went halfway across the country with us.) Old my arse. Bet your booty I wrote her a letter telling her to get. over. here. She tried, but then there was a medical emergency and she couldn't come anyway. THAT excuse, I was okay with.
oh, mannnnn. that's some bullpucky if I ever heerd it.
p.s. that BABY! looks as if he coulda died and gone to cake heaven, right then. also, if he'd asked, I'd have joined him. because, cake. and that BABY!.
:) *hug* (and you SO know I would've made an appearance, and eaten loads of the sandwich wraps, and made my entourage do the same, if we lived close.)
I don't know what it is with people and their party manners these days.
But it looks like your guy had an AMAZING time, and you captured the all-important cake moment perfectly. :-)
I said it once and Ill say it again....you have the cutest little guy!!! He looks so precious with that cake! Sorry about the boobs...we all have them. lol
Great cake picture!! I love those. As for the guests that didn't make it, their loss!! Boobs!
Carrie
All those excuses would of pissed me off too.
It looks like your one year old cutie had a great time:)
Something suspiciously similar happened at my son's recent second birthday party . . . But, as we'd planned to have half the party outside if possible, and it rained, I suppose it was for the best . . .
Also I just realized I forgot to send in the RSVP card for a wedding and had to call the mother of the bride to apologize and now I feel like a boob.
I totally have family like that too. For my oldest daughters 1st birthday my Aunt wanted to go sailing on her boat instead of spending one hour at the party. My dad told her he would never talk to her again if she didn't come. She came, but come on do you really want somebody there who had to be threatened? Oh and at least you have people rsvp. I got one person at this years party that rsvp'd. Uggg boobs are right!
PS love the pic
Ha ha! You remind me of the one-year-old parties my play group had last year. It was nasty. The moms DID show up at some parties and DIDN'T show up at others. It totally split my play group in the end.
Which is fine because my new one is ten times better. :)
You guys are right. I forget all about the boobs when I look at that picture. Well, almost.
Andrea, yeah, I guess a medical emergency can get you off the hook. But I want to see a doctor's note. LOL
Lildb: I got a sandwich wrap with your name on it. Now if only I could convince you to move to Cali...
Tasha: it's tough when you have to resort to threats, but whatever works I guess...he he.
Jaelithe: better late than never. You are no boob!
ST: ooh, that kinda thing is sure to split up a playgroup fast!
Ugh, the crazy excuses people give drive me insane. It's like they don't care that you spent extra money, expecting them to be there.
And that's a great pic of a baby and a cake. I love those smooshed cake pics! :)
oh, but to rid the world of boobs!! But just look at everything that picture conveys -- it was their loss, and you survived, and Little Guy had an okay time! I say another party is in order.
It drives me crazy when people don't keep social commitments. It seems to be acceptable lately to back out of things at the last minute with a lame excuse.
Not acceptable to me.
Great pic!
Gotta love the first birthday photo!
My name's Tracie, not Abby, but I just wanted to add--hey those people are boobs and you didn't need them to come anyway!
I'd totally vote them off the island, BOOBS.
On the other hand the picture of your little man and his birthday cake is priceless. What a doll!
Tracie: when I read your comment I was like, 'oh my God! Did I accidently call her Abby on her blog or something? Oh no.' And then I actually went to your blog to see if I had done that.
And then I realized that I am a total idiot.
So, do you know if it's possible to re-grow brain cells?
One more vote for "Boobs, all of them" here.
But its that picture that got me. I want to lick the cake off his fingers, its so cute. Plus, I like cake.
I remember all my kids first birthday cake. I love the pic shots of them eating it in the high chair. It is so classic. Don't let those who didn't come ruin your moment. It was a fun party without them and besides I am sure the little one had the most fun after all.
Love the cake face picture! I threw a surprise party for Hubby a few months back and I was pissed at a few of our friends who gave lame excuses for their absence. One guy had the nerve to say he had gone out the night before and he didn't think his wife would appreciate him going out another night. WHAT?!?!?!?
Happy bday! That picture, that's THE picture. The keeper. I love it.
Thalia's is coming up and while our relatives are pretty reliable, I just realized that she has no one-year old buds. Do we suck as parents?
Help! I need some friends for my daughter - What's your kid doing around, say, noon on 7/8?
Happy Birthday baby! I had that happen too. Apparently June is a crappy month for birthday parties -- I've had the same thing happen and I've heard of other moms with kids born in June saying the same thing.
Adoreable pic!
Mom 101: Puhleeese. No, you do NOT suck. Family is what matters most to me anyway. That being said, Little Guy loves to party. What time should we be there? he he
Lisa: thanks. you made me feel better. :)
Great Day: that is some saying. I'm gonna have to write that one down. LOL
It isn't a first birthday without the cake photo. Preferably chocolate.
Forgot to tell you, I'm from CA too.
San Joaquin valley.
Yes it's really rude to RSVP and not show up. People are really lame sometimes..these are the types of people who are inconsiderate and lazy. Maybe you should evaluate your friendships with these people?
True enough, that only other moms know HOW important Birthday #1 is! ;) Your baby is just too precious with the cake. Being that I have so many internet mommies with babies the same age as mine, I have seen a lot of cake-eating pics lately. You are the ONLY mommy so far that has stripped her baby down to the diaper (I presume?), which is exactly what I plan to do as well. I don't want him to get cake all over his First Birthday Outfit!!
Yeah, unless you're like, out of the country, first birthays cannot be missed.
Love the pic!
Granny: wow, we're practically neighbors. Awesome. It's hotter than heck here right now, huh?
Janice: Nice to meet you too! I'll stop by your blog later to say hi.
K: You and I are on the same wavelength! Yeah, I stipped him for cake eating. I figured he'd be much easier to clean off that way. I'm glad I did because it got pretty messy. The pic I posted was when he was still eating it fairly daintily. lol
Oh, and I expect to see a cake eating pic of your little man on the big day too!
Glad you got the requisite cake-on-face picture. Priceless!
Too bad the DUI guy couldn't make it. In my experience, those with a DUI on their record are often the life of the party. . . . Well, at least until you have to pry the lampshade off their head and gently take their keys.
First birthdays are mandatory.
Curses on those people!
Happy Birthday!! Love the picture. Those shitheads (boobs is too nice of a word) missed a wonderful party and photo-op.
Totally boobs. SOrry. That is so disappointing. It looks like he had a blast though! People don't understand or forget how momentous a first birthday is. It is a celebration for YOU just as much as for your son. Happy birthday little guy!!
Ahhh... I figure when someone misses the party it is their loss...
A first birthdya only happens once... and if they missed it...
They will not be in the scrapbook of memories and that is pretty sad...
And what a great shot of your wee pumpkin!!!!
I can't believe the excuses - that is so rude. Such cute pic though - and cute the way you did the Dear Abby thing - very creative!
Hey, happy first kiddo!!!!!!!
Awe! Love the pic!! And I get mad when people decide not to show up too!
Happy Birthday to your little one! looks like he really enjoyed that cake.
I agree, unless a nasty illness strikes that can be passed on to everyone else at the party, best to get one's butt to the party...no excuses!
All of them boobs!
My sister is known to come up with some gems herself.
Her best yet: her dog is epileptic and it might storm, so she has to stay home.
Yeah... ok.
Thanks for the comment. We might be 100 miles from Sacto but no further than that.
One of the frequent visitors to granny is from Madera, about 30 miles south on 99. Small world.
Tea? Crumpets?
Look at that bunny chowing down on sugar......it is a true milestone (the birthday, not the sugar that is).
My big girl hits 9 this in a few days. Treasure the little years, they are very precious.
Anne
if its any consolation at least your family bothered to make stupid excuses? half of mine just blew off the the party i did on saturday for the kids and didnt even have the courtesy to make a stupid excuse :(
I don't know about that whole regrowing brain cells thing, but if you figure it out let me know!!
I had my daughter in just the diaper for the special cake moment too......then we got her all cleaned up and put the pretty dress back on!
What a great photo!!!!
And those idiot relatives? I have them, too.
How can people behave that way when it's a child's first birthday party? You were too easy on them. Grrr...
You're killing me with that photo. Killing me.
My heart goes out to you. Just ran across this while trawling for solace since a very similar thing happened to me this past weekend. Why am I always surprised? This same Little Brute Family didn't bother to visit our baby and me in the hospital when he was born last year.And this idiot of a brother has two of his own kids, so he knows how important it is. I have an ethical question: should one continue to honor the occasions of family members who repeatedly dis yours? I want to teach my son to honor, respect, and forgive but I don't want to teach him to be a doormat, as I now realize I've been. Help! I'm so mad I could spit!
Anyway, you're baby is beautiful - curls, cake, and all. Happiness is the best revenge.
Hi Anonymous,
Not sure if you'll stop back by here, but I wanted to respond to your comment.
I would be mad if my brother didn't visit me in the hospital as well. Your feelings are normal and justified. As to your question: should one continue to honor the occasions of family members who repeatedly dis yours? I think that ideally we would continue to honor those family members even when they hurt us, if only out of love for our own children...tension among family members is never good for the kids. BUT....that is definitely easier said than done. When someone hurts me, my first instinct is to shut them out. It takes me a lot of effort to turn the other cheek. It's what I know I should do, but it's definitely not always the easy thing to do.
Good luck figuring it out, and thanks for visiting here!
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