Wednesday, November 22, 2006

1955 Called. They Need Their Male Chauvinism Back.

Have you seen this circling the Internet? It's an actual article from a 1955 issue of Good Housekeeping. Or so I hear. I don't actually have any proof that this is a real article. It is pretty hard to believe this is not a joke. I hope it is a joke. Anyone know?

I couldn't stop laughing while I read it. For one thing, this chick is cooking with heels on. WTF?

I can't figure out how to post a large image of the article so I have posted the text below.

The Good Wife's Guide

Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.

Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.

During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.

Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

Don't greet him with complaints and problems.

Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.

Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.

A good wife knows her place.

I would love to provide commentary on this, as it is just begging to be critiqued, but alas, I do not have time for much blogging tonight. So, I will just say this:

As we prepare for the U.S. celebration of Thanksgiving this week, let us all join together to give a hearty Thank the LORD that we don't live in 1955.


Blogger Bobita said...

OMG! I hope to merciful pete that this is a joke, but I would not be surprised if it is real. I join you in giving thanks that it is not 1955!!

It might be fun to rewrite this so that it applies to 2006...and add this one:

When your husband arrives home after work, have the dirty laundry waiting for him at the front door. Greet him with a sweet smile, kiss his cheek softly and then whisper in his ear..."if you don't finish these eight loads of laundry tonight, I might have to stick a fork in your neck. But make my martini first. Love you."


12:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I saw that and I can't believe it either...What the fark?

5:07 AM  
Blogger Jen said...

A friend of mine sent this to me not too long ago.......I laughed so hard I peed on myself......

5:09 AM  
Blogger Chantal said...

Every time I see this again, I try to see some bright side - put myself there and give them the benefit of the doubt! But I can't.

My husband married a human. Not a robot! His parents had a relationship like the one in that article and I know he thought it was messed up. A few weeks ago he actually said "I like that our house is messy!" because he was not allowed to mess when he was a kid. Crazy, eh?

5:43 AM  
Blogger Self Proclaimed Supermom said...

Yeah I know my place..LOL!

That is hysterical!

5:48 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Chicky said...

The only time I'm going to put a ribbon in my hair is if I'm placing it there to have it ready for when I feel like strangling my husband with something.

Yes, I know my place.

Happy Thanksgiving!

6:25 AM  
Anonymous Elizabeth said...

I can't find it in my archives anywhere, but I've posted this too! I believe says it's made up, but it's still funny as hell. My favorite one is "Don't complain if...he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work." WTF???!!

Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family!

6:44 AM  
Blogger Slackermommy said...

I actually know several women who are a 1950's wife although not as extreme as this. I totally cannot relate with them which is good because their husbands forbid their wives to hang with me. They think I'm a "bad influence". Damn right! I wear the pants in my marriage because hubby can't find them.

I recently read somewhere that it is an actual article. Wouldn't surprise me.

6:52 AM  
Blogger radioactive girl said...

Pure craziness! No wonder my grandma was always so bitter and angry.

6:54 AM  
Blogger Jodi said...

"Pure craziness! No wonder my grandma was always so bitter and angry." I thought the EXACT same thing when I read the article that I HAVE seen floating around the internet. No matter how much we like to bitch about our lives, at least nobody is expecting us to do the things that stupid stupid article suggested! I'd rather die I think.

7:52 AM  
Blogger Pendullum said...

I've seen the article...
And know that no woman in my family ever was given this article.
I come from immigrant stock where work, hard intensive labour was not only for men but for women too.
My grandmothers could take on any man today. or from the fifties... and they always expressed their opinions... and discussion of' ideals' were always happening around the dinner table...

I never thought I would ever be so thankful of my eastern european grandparents as I am now.

Happy Thanksgiving...

7:55 AM  
Blogger NtycnBoricua said...

Ok, I don't want to be the party pooper, I really don't. But, here's the Snopes website concerning this "article":

They have yet to determine if it's true or false, but it's pretty interesting to read.

That said, I've seen this before and I still laugh every time I read it. Just to think that maybe a magazine would have printed that is funny. Actually, my mom sort of does some of those things for my dad - even after being married for almost 40 years! Too bad I don't take after her in that aspect!

8:32 AM  
Blogger sunshine scribe said...

Oh my god. That's crazy. Thanks for sharing it.

9:28 AM  
Blogger Beck's Mommy said...

You mean I'm the only one who does all that?! ;P

9:53 AM  
Blogger Linus said...

I've seen this before and I'm not sure whether it's legit or not. But it is hysterical! A good woman knows her place . . . and so does her husband if he knows what's good for him!!

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

10:14 AM  
Blogger Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

Whether or not it was a printed article in 1955 or not, it probably was applicable to many households in that time, which is sad to think about. Glad we've come such a long way that it is hysterical to read such nonsense;>

11:04 AM  
Blogger aka_Meritt said...

It is a joke... it was a little original but it's been doctored MANY times. I remember seeing it back around 1999 - 2000 ish, and it's even been changed a little since then.

11:09 AM  
Blogger jennster said...

i have seen that so many times and it cracks me up everyone it comes back around. THANK THE GODDESS WE HAVE EVOLVED

radio show tonight.. 7pm our time, which is probably crappy timing for you???

11:30 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Yep, I've seen it. For about a year now I've had a printout of that on the fridge. We get such a laugh out of reading it now and then. It's even funnier when our friends find it on the fridge and read it.

12:26 PM  
Blogger jen said...

dude. i totally do all that stuff, every single day. and with higher heels..

ok so i just cracked myself up.

12:51 PM  
Anonymous Much More Than A Mom said...

Be a little gay for him? Yep, that's for sure. Any man who expects that would get a lesbian out of me - and fast.


That's posted on the fridge in my staff room and has been for years. My male principal finds it hilarious.

1:01 PM  
Blogger Damselfly said...

Too weird. This reminds me of the handbook my MIL got in the 60s as the wife of a "company man." Yes, the wives got handbooks on how to act. One of the tips in the handbook was to wear a wig when out in public to ensure a neat hairstyle.

2:02 PM  
Anonymous chelle said...

What you guys do not have the house sparkling, heals and pearls on and a roast in the oven everyday?!?!?

2:58 PM  
Anonymous Momish said...

I have seen that! The first time I read it I almost choked on the lovely meal my husband cooked me after a long day's work at the office! Thank the Lord indeed!

But, I must confess, I do just everything around the house in heels!! (I'm short)

5:22 PM  
Blogger Susan Gets Native said...

I read this on my Mom's computer a while back and tried in vain to get it saved so I could put it on my blog.
As the Virginia Slim's ads say:
"You've come a long way, baby!"
Jesus...did women really believe that crap?????

7:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work."

"Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him."

OMG! I can't believe it either! LOL.

Thank God we were not in that era!

Happy Thanksgiving to you all! And by the way, would you come over to my blog and say something about this: Digging the Best out of Us as Parents ?

I hope you love it and share this little gift to everyone you love :)

8:10 PM  
Anonymous adwina - said...

Oh, sorry, the previous comment was mine. The internet connection was awful, so the name didn't appear :( .


8:18 PM  
Blogger scribbit said...

Oh I'm sure it's for real, my mother has a book published about that time that she has saved because it offers similar advice and it's a hoot.

9:17 PM  
Blogger sunshinedaily4me_wuz_here said...

I too saw that in an email...and my jaw totally dropped. I guess times have really changed, or they better! And I too am thankful I don't live THEN!

6:03 AM  
Blogger PunditMom said...

It's hard to comment while I'm rolling on the floor laughing! I just hope they don't start recirculating any of the advice from Marabel Morgan!

7:48 AM  
Blogger Eve said...

sadly enough, this is what my husband thinks.

7:56 PM  
Blogger carrie said...

My Aunt gave me a copy of this when I got married as a joke, I almost peed my pants reading it!!! Thanks for reminding me how lucky we have it!!


1:45 PM  
Blogger Liam's Mom - Gina said...

AMEN! Seen this, laughed, got angry, took note, then filed it away for a post something like your idea with commentary.

11:10 PM  
Blogger Mary said...

I have seen this. I'm sure it's authentic. "Thank God we're not living in 1955?" AMEN!

2:17 PM  
Blogger Jessica said...

LMAO If I did those things for my husband he would be sniffing my breath to see if I had been drinking.

11:56 AM  
Blogger kfk said...

I posted a retake version of this a long time ago. You can see it here:

2:10 PM  
Blogger kfk said...

Let me try that again. Here

2:15 PM  
Blogger kfk said...

Oh good god. One more time.

2:26 PM  
Blogger MommyWithAttitude said...

You don't cook in high heels????? Probably no pearls or panty hose then either? What kind of "wife" are you anyway???

BTW, if this is not real, it's pretty close to what was in women's magazines in the 50s (and sometimes on the Dr. Phil show even today! LOL)

10:54 PM  
Blogger Dirty Birdie said...

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit...

11:58 AM  

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