Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Rebalancing

I don't know how to really begin this post so I'm going to just go ahead and say it: I'm taking a break from blogging. Probably a long break. Possibly a permanent break. I've been feeling the need to do this for a while now. Without going on and on about all the reasons why, I will just say that the main reason is that I just don't feel that I have time to blog anymore. The truth is that I never really had the time to blog, but I fit it in late at night, during Little Guy's naptimes, on breaks at work. I used up almost every free ounce of my time blogging - and I loved it. I loved having a writing outlet and I loved meeting other moms and dads (you!) over the Internet.

But when I became pregnant, I could no longer keep up. I couldn't stay up past 8:30pm. I was barely functioning at work. I was exhaused and nauseas all day and, though the exhaustion has lessened, I'm still battling vomiting and nausea in the mornings. As a result, the pregnancy has forced me to stop blogging with as much intensity as I had in the past. And as I stepped back from blogging, I realized that I had gotten a bit addicted to it. It had turned into almost a part-time job - only one I didn't get paid to do.

Also, I had become very guilt-ridden about commenting. Or not commenting, I should say. I almost completely stopped commenting on blogs for about 3 months during this pregnancy, and though I honestly can say that I don't feel that a blogger has to comment back to everyone who comments on their posts or that bloggers should have to comment on other blogs at all for that matter, for me, not commenting on any blogs made me feel very detached from the blogging community. I didn't like the feeling. Even though I was receiving comments on my posts, I felt almost like I had put myself in an isolation room. It was the weirdest thing. And yet I don't feel I have the time to keep up the connections and the relationships that I would like to in the blogosphere.

And then there's my life. The one I'd like to get back to. During my year of blogging, I rarely went to bed at the same time as my husband because I did most of my blogging in the evenings. I want to get our evenings back.

I want to do a lot of other things too. I want to do a hypnobirthing homestudy course. I want to take some prenatal yoga classes. I want to read for fun. I want to explore fun things for Little Guy and I to do in the Springtime. I want to get more involved with my mom friends and plan activities that we can do with our kids. I want to set up a living trust for our family - something we've put off for a while. I want to pursue getting my Italian citizenship - another thing I wanted to do forever and haven't gotten around to it. There are lot and lots of things that I've put off or scaled back on in order to blog and I feel it's time to rebalance my life a bit.

So after one year of blogging, I'm saying "good-bye." For now.

Actually, I've been saying good-bye in my heart for a few months now. I just haven't had the courage to tell you until now.

I didn't realize it would be so hard. It's damn hard. I will miss everyone so much.

But here's what I've been also thinking. I'm going to keep this blog up and if I feel like posting from time to time, I will. I don't know if I'll ever post again, but I might. (Like if I have an urgent need to post something about penises or ball scratchers.)

And I'm also planning to continue blogging on a more private site that I will be allowing my friends and family to access. Because one of the things I have realized is that I had posted less and less about Little Guy on this blog. Not sure how it happened but it did. So I want to start a blog that is just me writing down things that he does - nothing fancy, no blogroll or buttons or doo-dads - just a place to chronicle his new words and stuff like that. Once I start that blog, I would be happy to share the address with any of you who would like to keep in touch with me. And I also hope to continue to read - and hey comment now and then too! - on your blogs now again.

So, for now, thanks for being a reader of my blog. Thanks for taking the time to get to know me.

xoxoxoxo,
MotR

p.s. If anyone would like to keep in touch with me through my private mommy blog, please e-mail me and I'll share the address with you once I set it up.

We're gonna miss you guys.

65 Comments:

Anonymous Colleen said...

I'll miss you guys too! But I understand your reasons for leaving. I've enjoyed your blog and getting to know you and your fun take on things. Good luck with baby #2! You've got a huge group of readers who will miss you.

P.S. I'm typing this in bed as my husband tries to sleep next to me. Maybe you're on to something...

10:16 PM  
Anonymous chelle said...

We are going to miss you too!! I totally totally understand. If not for the commitment to family, I am sure I would have waived more by now.

Take care of you, the last year of getting to know you and Little Guy has been wonderful. Thank you for being a part of our lives too.

10:17 PM  
Blogger Mel said...

Oh man, that's too bad. You will definitely be missed.
But I understand. You own the blog; the blog does not own you.
I'll keep an eye out for you.

1:13 AM  
Anonymous AdventureDad said...

Damn it, this sucks. I'm going to miss you funny writing. But I totally understand, it's tough to fit all the pieces of life together in a good way. Good luck with the family, with the new baby, and thanks for all the fun.

AD

2:34 AM  
Blogger Janet a.k.a. "Wonder Mom" said...

I totally get it. But you will be terrible missed.

Take care and stay well...

4:59 AM  
Blogger Kris said...

I commend anyone that identifies what needs to be done in their life and then acts upon it, no matter how difficult. I wish you the best of luck. You will be missed.

5:47 AM  
Blogger The Flip Flop Mamma! said...

Oh man, I'm going to miss you too. I get soo sad when a blogger stops, but I totally understand. I often wonder when I read these posts if I will be writing one some day. I know life will get even more demanding once the new baby is born, so I'll have to see how things go. Bye for now!

6:19 AM  
Blogger Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

Sounds like you've made a wise decision, one that needed to be made. Good luck.

6:47 AM  
Blogger kgirl said...

I'll miss you, but a mama's gotta do what a mama's gotta do.
good luck.

6:57 AM  
Anonymous Much More Than A Mom said...

You'll definitely be missed. I totally understand - you're smart to recognize what needs to be done.

7:07 AM  
Blogger Kat said...

I can understand your reasons. I'm 8 months pregnant and if you look at my site my posts are far and few between. I try to keep up but with a 2 ear old also it is just too difficult. Take it easy. Maybe you can do what I do for the time being and just post something when you actually do have time to yourself. You will be missed and good luck with your pregnancy.

7:45 AM  
Blogger something blue said...

(Big Hugs) to you!

Yours is a voice that will be missed but life is more important.

7:59 AM  
Blogger margalit said...

I'll miss you guys, too. But I get it. Good luck!

8:23 AM  
Blogger Granny said...

I've been going through much the same thing and I think I understand your decision.

I do read you; just don't comment much for the reasons you already mentioned. Lack of time to do much except lurk.

I'll leave you on my list. I enjoy reading your posts and who knows what the future will bring.


Best wishes

Ann (aka granny)

8:24 AM  
Blogger Undercover Angel said...

I'll miss you, but I understand. Take care of yourself and your family, and maybe someday we'll see you back.

8:28 AM  
Blogger Kyla said...

Oh MotR! We will miss you. But it is completely understandable...life is life, and it happens to the best of us. *lol* Go, live it, get those things back for yourself and your husband and LG and new baby. We will still be around and we will be glad to see you when you pop in.

8:55 AM  
Blogger Kristin said...

I'm going to miss you too! I am down to posting and commenting about 1 morning a week... it's all I truly have time for.

Best of luck with this new baby and all the wonderful changes ahead!

9:10 AM  
Anonymous Andrea said...

Aw, I'll miss you too! But I get it. Maybe you can come back when your kids are older and you don't need the third set of eyes in your head. Or the seventh extra arm.

Keep in touch!

9:37 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Chicky said...

You will be missed! But your family is much more important. Good luck with that new baby and continued happiness with your little guy. I hope I'll still "see" you around from time to time.

{{{Big Hugs}}}

9:38 AM  
Anonymous Nancy said...

Like everyone else, I get it, though your voice will be missed.

Please keep in touch as much as you can, my friend. I'll be sending you e-mails to check in.

xoxoxo

10:57 AM  
Blogger Damselfly said...

Miss you already!

12:52 PM  
Anonymous jenn said...

I'm sad to see you go, but completely understand your need to.

good luck with everything! Can't wait to see a picture of that new baby. don't forget to post and let us know what you're having.

1:55 PM  
Blogger sweatpantsmom said...

We'll miss you! But I completely understand everything you're talking about - the addiction, guilt over not commenting, etc.

Good luck with the new baby! Please keep us updated, when you can.

3:20 PM  
Blogger Mama's Moon said...

Oh, I'm so going to miss you. I JUST started reading you a few short weeks ago and now you're leaving! Your honesty, wit & humor will be missed, lady! But I know what you mean about getting your evenings back, and doing more stuff with the kiddo. When I'm the only one up late at night posting and commenting I feel that very same pang.

Much luck to you and your family, and many blessings for your next little bundle! Take care of you - I'll check in from time to time to see if you've put something up...

3:58 PM  
Blogger ~d said...

I am very impressed with your devotion to your child. This blogging can be tiresome. And you have QUITE a reading audience! I have, more than once, thought about walking away. But alas, I have not. Yet.
Be well. Be happy!

4:01 PM  
Blogger Red Rollerskate said...

Totally understandable! Not to sound judgmental, but you are doing the RIGHT thing! :)

And I totally understand about the commenting. And the addiction. :)

Love ya,
RR

4:19 PM  
Blogger lildb said...

I'd say I'm gonna miss you but since I know where you live, I can just continue my stalkery there. :p

seriously; I'm glad you're doing this, because I know it's a relief. but to pretend I'm not sad? that would be such a blatant falsehood.

wah.

6:16 PM  
Blogger Dana a/k/a Sunshine said...

Of course you know you will be so missed. I admire you for doing what you are doing. Seriously. Your family deserves to come first and blogging should never ever come first. We will all miss you of course, but throw us a bone every now and then - ha ha. I wish you all the best. You are a very talented writer and I have thoroughly enjoyed your blog and geting to know you. Little Guy is a total doll!!! Take care and God Bless You and your family.

6:37 PM  
Blogger Dana a/k/a Sunshine said...

Of course you know you will be so missed. I admire you for doing what you are doing. Seriously. Your family deserves to come first and blogging should never ever come first. We will all miss you of course, but throw us a bone every now and then - ha ha. I wish you all the best. You are a very talented writer and I have thoroughly enjoyed your blog and geting to know you. Little Guy is a total doll!!! Take care and God Bless You and your family.

6:38 PM  
Blogger Em said...

Thank you for sharing bits of your life with us. It has been a pleasure getting to know you a bit. Best of luck in the future!

6:38 PM  
Blogger metro mama said...

I'll miss you, but I understand. I'll keep you in my bloglines so I'll be here when you do post!

6:48 PM  
Blogger darch said...

and I just found you too...best of luck and I will miss your words.

7:03 PM  
Anonymous Momish said...

You will be sorely missed, but I totally admire your courage and knowing what is right for you. I completely understand as I have often debated just bailing out for good.

I think the private blog is a great idea and hope it fills the niche. Best of luck with the new baby!!!

7:21 PM  
Blogger Pattie said...

Cristina,
I totally understand and sympathize with how you feel. That is why I only blog once a week now. I was feeling the same pressures, and blogging can take over your life. It is like an addiction. I have found that doing it once a week is manageable and much more enjoyable. I will miss you. Let me know when you come back to blogging.

4:16 AM  
Anonymous Moobs said...

Noo! Would it help if I cried; begged; danced naked?

How can you let something like your life get in the way of making me happy? The selfishness!

Thanks for all the joy you given me with your excellent writing. I hope this is just a break and you come back and rejoin your internet family soon.

5:57 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I'm gonna miss you lady. I wish you and your family well...

I'm keeping your link and hoping that from time to time you WILL do a post here and there... Maybe post a pic when the baby comes?

12:01 PM  
Blogger mamatulip said...

I'll miss you, but I completely understand.

Be well. xo

1:24 PM  
Blogger jennster said...

we live far too close to eachother to never see eachother,.... hang in there and ENJOY your life- it's too short, ad the kids are only kids for so long.. no regrets! smooch

4:22 PM  
Blogger Ruth Dynamite said...

Sad to hear this, but I totally understand. I wish you nothing but the best! (And I hope you'll throw us a few scraps from time to time!)

5:44 PM  
Anonymous Karly said...

Oh, I hate to hear that but I can totally understand. Take care!

6:08 PM  
Blogger Random Musings Of My Life said...

Oh my I am going to miss you!! I am so happy for you and your family!!
Good luck with the baby!

11:24 PM  
Blogger radioactive girl said...

I will miss you! Hopefully you will be back every once in a while!

1:09 PM  
Blogger jen said...

hat's off, friend. good for you for reclaiming what you need to.

take good care.

4:27 PM  
Blogger Catch said...

Good luck Sweety and God bless....when the new baby comes you are really going to be busy and all of us Mothers understand that. You will be missed, but we do understand your reasons for leaving...hugs to you Sweety! I will miss that beautiful little guys pictures, he is such a doll!

4:40 PM  
Blogger Jill said...

OK. If we don't hear from you again before your due date, good luck with Baby off the Record # 2! I'm sure he will appreciate the extra time you have for him.

8:46 PM  
Blogger Sandra said...

Look at me rebalancing ... I only let myself read blogs once a week and look what happened. I missed this?!?!

I am so selfishly sad to see you go. I love your writing and your voice and will miss you a lot.

If you ever change your mind, and need to return, you know we'll be here.

3:32 AM  
Anonymous FENICLE said...

That's a bummer! I had just found your blog & enjoyed reading it! I understand though. Hope you'll still visit my site. Take care!!!

5:47 AM  
Anonymous CrankMama said...

You'll be missed, MoTR, but I totally understand!!

9:23 PM  
Blogger Piece of Work said...

These are exactly the reasons I stopped blogging too. And strangely enough, I don't really miss it. I mean, of course, here I am, commenting--but skimming and lurking takes up a lot less time than writing and reading and commenting.

6:20 PM  
Anonymous throw in the towel said...

sad to hear but i'm sure everyone hear understands about having no time. we're always here when/if you need us again!

5:11 PM  
Blogger Pendullum said...

Cristina you have my address..Please give me the link...
Will so miss MotR.. You were one of the first sites...and I sooooo loved your writing...

9:26 AM  
Blogger carrie said...

Thank you for sharing so much of yourself over the past year! I have enjoyed every moment (especially the hilarious ones) and I completely understand and support your decision to stop, if forever, if for a little while, whatever.

I hope you get the time to do the things you want, and need before baby #2 comes along (which will be soon). And, I wish you the best of luck!

I will miss you.

Carrie

3:09 PM  
Blogger Her Bad Mother said...

(missing you already.)

4:50 PM  
Blogger It's okay, Sweetie said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

7:55 PM  
Blogger It's okay, Sweetie said...

Wow. I just came back from an extended absence and come to find you're leaving!?! Bummer!! I still fondly remember the "Perfect Post Award" I nominated you for - 'Walking the Guantlet'. I'll forever think of that while shopping in Target. See the impact you've made?? You're a great writing talent. One of the few blogs I actually took time to READ, not skim through. And I think you eloquently expressed what some of us feel about the balance between blogging and life. I can see from the comments you've developed quite the network! Best of luck to you and your new addition!

7:58 PM  
Anonymous Jenny said...

Just checking in to see if you've stopped in for some impromptu blogging.

Love ya, chica!

5:47 PM  
Blogger Heidi said...

I'll miss you too...especially since your baby is due only a few weeks from mine!

Besides, your funny! Anyway, I totally understand, I just took a couple week break and realized many of the same things so I'm cutting way back too.

9:17 PM  
Blogger kfk said...

Free, you're free! Sometimes I wonder how that would feel.

Good luck to you and take care.

5:38 AM  
Blogger MommyWithAttitude said...

I'll miss your blog. I have such a long blogroll and so many new people comment who I check out and love --- there are just too many good blogs for me to be able to comment often enough! So I know how you feel. Best wishes for you and your new baby.

9:12 AM  
Blogger modmom said...

i just found your blog today on someone's technorati + it had like 800 links, so i wanted to check you out + i see you only started bloggin 1 year ago, wow, you are popular!
that's a great decision you're making to take care of your family + you. my blog started as a personal baby blog, then got linked on design sites + i don't write personal things + i feel guilty about not keeping track of all the wonderful things she does, because i won't be able to remember it all.

8:09 PM  
Anonymous Izzy said...

Just to show you you're not alone in your lack of commenting, i give you myself as an example.

I just don't get around nearly as much as I'd like and here I am almost half a month later finding out you're not blogging anymore.

And the guilt I'm feeling is probably not unlike the guilt you've been feeling and thus, I totally understand where you're coming from.

Go! Enjoy your life and live guilt-free! I will miss you and I totally want to know when the baby comes!

*hugs*

6:14 AM  
Anonymous krista said...

I am in the exact same place. Funny the way that happens with blogging.
I'd love to know your private blog. I like reading about babies, and the cute things they do. Your little guy is the same age as mine (George)

9:06 PM  
Blogger Mommy off the Record said...

Hi Krista,
Have you moved your blog? The link isn't working anymore and I don't have your email address...
Cristina

11:40 AM  
Blogger Pendullum said...

My heart skipped a beat as it said you updated...
An certainly you were just here...
Misssing you Cristina and hoping all is going well..

11:23 AM  
Anonymous Jenny said...

Okay I give up. Apparently you aren't coming back after all. Sigh.

Email me your private blog, huh? I miss you.

daisymaeperez73@hotmail.com

11:09 AM  

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