Little Guy's Daycare is Making Me Feel Like Crap
Today, we received the following letter from Little Guy's daycare teacher.
We were already made aware, through a recent conversation with the teacher, that Little Guy has been stubborn at school - for example, he bangs his utensils at the lunch table even after the teachers tell him to stop. Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, he also does this at home. We have been working on telling him to stop the behavior and then giving him a natural consequence if he doesn't stop (e.g., removing his spoon/fork and making him eat with his hands.)
So here's my question - isn't this just normal toddler behavior? At home, I've never been concerned about his behavior. In fact, I've always thought he was a pretty easy toddler to manage in that he can be fairly easily redirected and doesn't really throw major tantrums. Yes, he does things that he has been told not to do (e.g., tries to sneak cookies from the pantry) and yes he doesn't always listen the first time (e.g., continues to sneak cookies after I tell him to stop), but isn't that just normal? I practice redirection, distraction, tell him "no", and use time-outs if he doesn't listen after two warnings.
Am I not being strict enough at home? I don't know. I thought I was handling the discipline pretty well, but the daycare is making me feel like my kid is really hard to handle. And this is a kid that I have always found to be fairly obedient all things considered. I mean he is only two. He's not even two and a half yet. Is the daycare expecting too much from him or does it sound like my kid is unusually bad? This isn't the first time they have told me that he misbehaves and is disruptive. He is also very quiet at school and rarely talks, they've said, while at home he talks a lot. I do believe the daycare to be very good and I'm not really concerned about the quality of care. It was hard to get into this daycare because it is well-regarded and other parents love it. The teachers communicate to parents regularly through these letters home, which I like. I just feel bad that lately the tone of the letters have been pretty negative. How would you respond to this letter?
Social deviant or misunderstood toddler?
I wanted to update you on Little Guy's week. This week Little Guy has had a difficult time following directions and completing routines and more often than not has needed a teacher's help to complete the direction/routine. Often Little Guy is looking right at a teacher and doing the opposite of what he has been told (for example, getting a toy out when we are cleaning up) or doing something unsafe/unclean (such as licking toys or putting his jacket over his face while on the stairs). As this seems to be intentional behavior to gain attention, we are trying to meet his need for attention in positive ways instead of when he is exhibiting negative behavior. When we redirect Little Guy's behavior we try to use as few of words as possible choosing instead to give him that attention at other times/. Throughout play times we try to engage Little Guy in conversations about what he's doing and also throughout the day we encourage and celebrate with Little Guy as he listens the first time or does something on his own. If you have any questions, please let me know. Thanks for your support.
We were already made aware, through a recent conversation with the teacher, that Little Guy has been stubborn at school - for example, he bangs his utensils at the lunch table even after the teachers tell him to stop. Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, he also does this at home. We have been working on telling him to stop the behavior and then giving him a natural consequence if he doesn't stop (e.g., removing his spoon/fork and making him eat with his hands.)
So here's my question - isn't this just normal toddler behavior? At home, I've never been concerned about his behavior. In fact, I've always thought he was a pretty easy toddler to manage in that he can be fairly easily redirected and doesn't really throw major tantrums. Yes, he does things that he has been told not to do (e.g., tries to sneak cookies from the pantry) and yes he doesn't always listen the first time (e.g., continues to sneak cookies after I tell him to stop), but isn't that just normal? I practice redirection, distraction, tell him "no", and use time-outs if he doesn't listen after two warnings.
Am I not being strict enough at home? I don't know. I thought I was handling the discipline pretty well, but the daycare is making me feel like my kid is really hard to handle. And this is a kid that I have always found to be fairly obedient all things considered. I mean he is only two. He's not even two and a half yet. Is the daycare expecting too much from him or does it sound like my kid is unusually bad? This isn't the first time they have told me that he misbehaves and is disruptive. He is also very quiet at school and rarely talks, they've said, while at home he talks a lot. I do believe the daycare to be very good and I'm not really concerned about the quality of care. It was hard to get into this daycare because it is well-regarded and other parents love it. The teachers communicate to parents regularly through these letters home, which I like. I just feel bad that lately the tone of the letters have been pretty negative. How would you respond to this letter?
posted by Cristina @10:16 PM
22 Join Me For A Drink
